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omg_fmaWho: IC!Ed, OOC!Scar, NPC:Snow White, NPC: Evil Queen, NPC: Posse of Wildlife
When: 02/22/08
Rating: PG
Category: Side Plots
Summary: Mal and Ed test out whether the guitar method of dimension-shifting works for multiple people at once, and visit the wonderful world of Disney.
Other: The makers of this log recommend that you watch the first six minutes (or however long you can stand) of this video, before beginning to read the log, to remind you just how annoying that singing voice really is.
OOC!Scar: *waiting for Ed to show up at his room in Clara's place, his guitar all plugged in and a backpack slung over his shoulder, full of things he thinks will be useful in almost any situation; chocolate bars, some rope, matches, a bowl, paper and a pencil, something resembling a rudimentary Swiss army knife, and two canteens of water*
IC!Ed: *is being sneaky about getting to Mal's room since he's sort of avoiding Clara. finally gets there and knocks before opening the door and stepping inside* ...You all set?
OOC!Scar: *looking up with a companionable smile, though he can tell that Ed's still feeling like shit, sitting cross-legged on the floor* Yeah, I think I'm good to go. Except... you know this is probably not gonna work?
IC!Ed: *closes the door behind him and moves to stand next to him* I know that. Sure as hell worth a shot, though.
OOC!Scar: Fuck, man, that's what I thought. *patting the floor on his right side to indicate Ed should sit down, then going about tuning his guitar*
IC!Ed: *raises an eyebrow before sitting in the offered spot, watching Mal work*
OOC!Scar: *sitting up straight when he's done* Alright... why don't you try grabbing hold to my arm - the right one - since I'm pretty sure... Well. I think my tattoo's got somethin' to do with how it works.
IC!Ed: *just gives him a look that seems to say "are you fucking kidding me?"*
OOC!Scar: *biting the inside of his lip* What?! * a bit snappier than he intended*
IC!Ed: *continues to just look at him for a moment, then rolls his eyes and grabs onto Mal's right arm* Never mind. Just- do it.
OOC!Scar: *still feeling uneasy about that little exchange, but puts his fingers onto the right strings for the chord, and draws the pick down over the strings, rather feebly. Nothing happens*
IC!Ed: ... *deadpans* Wow. This dimension looks exactly Clara's house. *sighs* I thought you said something about blasting it as loud as possible?
OOC!Scar: *shakes his head slightly, trying to get his mind in the right place* Yeah, yeah, fuck, I know. I just have to get my head in the right place. *closes his eyes for a moment and exhales, pressing his fingers so hard against the strings that they bite into his calluses* Hold on tight
IC!Ed: *nods and grips tight with both hands, just in case interdimensional travel wants to separate his automail from the rest of his body*
OOC!Scar: *slams the pick down across the strings with his eyes still closed, almost in a trance but focusing hard on the cinching feel of Ed's hand on his arm; knows it has worked as soon as he does it*
IC!Ed: *ends up shutting his eyes as he braces himself for... whatever is going to happen. cautiously peels his eyes open one at a time after a moment to see what's happened*
OOC!Scar: *opens his eyes just a moment later, in time to see the massive Gate disappearing back to wherever it goes, drawing in a bit of a gasp when he realizes it has worked* Oh, fuck yeah! *jumping to his feet and whirling around to examine the surroundings*
SW: *whistling as she works, airing out the little log cabin that she shares with the Dwarvesthey smell really bad, yo with the assistance of her entourage of singing critters*
SW: *pauses only a moment to take the time to dance with a sheet, mooning over it* Some day my prince will come..~ *sparkly, sad eyes*
IC!Ed: *blinks, looking around them as he gets back to his feet. it's so... woodsy* ...Shit. Either it worked or we've both lost our minds. ...Is someone singing?
OOC!Scar: *with a horror-struck face* I - I think so, but ... did you just see that? *going a bit pale under his dark skin* I swear, I just saw like ... twenty squirrels and rabbits go running that way. *points towards the shrill singing*
20 Squirrels & Rabbits: *reach the cabin, sighing in dreamy manners as Snow White dances with the sheet*
OOC!Scar: *jumps out of the way as a bright-eyed skunk goes tearing past, slinging his guitar over his shoulder cautiously*
IC!Ed: *staring after said woodland creatures* ...What the hell is going on...? And please tell me it involves staying away from the singing.
SW: *high pitched warbling* We'll find our love anew...~ And the birds will sing...~ *and birds do in fact sing*
OOC!Scar: *nervous giggles* What? What, you're scared, huh? *mischievous look* Where's your sense of adventure, man?
IC!Ed: *mild glare* Like hell I am. That voice is just... really annoying.
SW: *gets more annoying as she reverts back to whistling and cleaning, making up one of the beds with the sheet*
OOC!Scar: *rubbing his hands together* Come on, just for a minute... *shifting his backpack on his back and then setting off towards the whistling, glimpsing a small house through the trees* ....the hell? *whispering to himself*
IC!Ed: *rolls his eyes, unable to believe he's actually going to follow Mal toward the stupid singing. spots the house as well, raising an eyebrow* That must be where it's coming from.
OOC!Scar: *nodding and creeping closer, around the back of the house*
IC!Ed: *really not looking forward to seeing whoever is making all that high pitched noise*
SW: *heading outside, followed by a deer who is helping her clean various bits of tableware; stops singing, startled by the presence of the other two and only vaguely wondering if perhaps one could be her prince*
OOC!Scar: *holds his hands up in the air in a gesture of peace, since the girl with the red bow in her hair looks so startled and made such a very girlish and terrifying noise*
IC!Ed: *just gives her a look like she's a total freak, hands in his pockets*
SW: *not really sure what to say, so blurts out the first thing that pops into her mind* ....The Dwarves shouldn't be back for another few hours! Shouldn't you be at the mines? *staring pointedly at Ed*
IC!Ed: *EYE TICK, suddenly waving his fists in the air at her* WHO THE HELL'RE YOU CALLIN' A DWARF?!?!?!?!
OOC!Scar: *quickly stifles a laugh, trying to pass it off as a cough and convulsing with a series of fake coughs*
SW: *jumps back, startled, getting ready to brandish the nearby broom should she need to at the rabid dwarf* ...Gr-grumpy..?
OOC!Scar: *starts to convulse even more, staggering over and supporting his weight against the house, laughing outright, now*
IC!Ed: *glares* WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU, I'M NOT A DWARF!!! *aims a punch at Mal's shoulder since he's closer and not a girl and he's LAUGHING wtf*
SW: *SO. CONFUSED.* B-but you're so short..!
OOC!Scar: *is punched without protest, wiping tears from his eyes and pushing off the wall to regain his balance*
OOC!Scar: *almost succumbs to the laughter again, reaching forward and grabbing Ed by the shoulder to restrain him from anything he might regret*
IC!Ed: *cannot pounce since Mal's grabbed onto him, so opts for giving the GLARE AND SNARL OF DOOM* I. AM NOT. SHORT.
OOC!Scar: Ed, chill. Who are you? *speaking to the strange girl*
SW: *backs up, grabbing the broom* A-alright, you're not a Dwarf! You're not, okay?!
SW: *looks to Mal, not sure what to say in case he freaks out too* ...S-Snow White. ...And who are you?
OOC!Scar: *shortly, still restraining Ed* My name's Mal. This is Ed.
IC!Ed: *still glaring, folding his arms over his chest and grumbling maliciously under his breath about stupid looking girls with annoying high pitched voices*
SW: *catches that and narrows her eyes, but otherwise pretends not to have heard; she is much taller after all, and could probably take him if she had to*
SW: *smiles in a syrupy fashion at Mal, trilling* Pleased to meet you~
OOC!Scar: *let's go of Ed cautiously, but can't help the slight widening of his eyes at the trilling greeting* Uh, yeah. You too.
IC!Ed: *snorts and rolls his eyes*
SW: *peers down at Ed* Young man, you're looking awfully... angry. With a smile and a song..~ *from somewhere in the background, music starts to pick up, mostly from a chorus of birds*
IC!Ed: *eyes go wide in horror, HOLY SHIT, she's singing again*
OOC!Scar: *whirling around, looking for the source of the music*
SW: *carries on, music getting louder as she gathers force* Life is just like a bright sun~ny day~ Your cares fade a~way~ And your heart is young~
IC!Ed: *gives Mal a look like "MAKE HER STOP"*
OOC!Scar: *backing away slowly, stumbles over a discarded pick-axe and falls head over heels with a muffled shout into the dusty road*
SW: *stops aruptly* Oh my goodness, are you okay?!
OOC!Scar: *instantly surrounded by a mob of fawning, concerned rabbits and chipmunks and chickadees, is momentarily speechless*
IC!Ed: *goes over to help Mal up, shooing the animals and offering a hand* Sheesh, what the hell're all these pick axes doing lying around your front yard, lady? *secretly glad the singing was interrupted*
SW: Oh those belong to the -- *pauses a moment, looking at Ed in a vapid, sweet manner* -- Dwarves.
OOC!Scar: *scrabbling for his feet, making sure his guitar is unharmed first off and then brushing dust from his clothes* 'm fine.
IC!Ed: *returns the sweet look with yet another glare*
SW: Oh goodness, are you sure you're okay?
OOC!Scar: *clears his throat, trying to ease the tension, is startled by the continued inquiry and the intensity of her shiny, vapid gaze* I'm really sure. So, are there any cities near here?
IC!Ed: Or any place that even remotely looks like it has people and not... squirrels living in it?
SW: Cities..? Goodness, no... The nearest one is so far away... *sighs dreamily, music starting to rise again* Some day, my prince will come..~ *music dies* Maybe from that city.
OOC!Scar: *elbows Ed covertly, but has to suppress a smirk*
OOC!Scar: Prince? *blurts, before he realizes prompting her might be a bad thing*
SW: *and there goes the music again* Some day we'll meet again~ And away to his castle we'll go~ To be happy forever I know~
IC!Ed: *actually does smirk at the elbowing* Like you weren't thinking it. *turns to give SW a blank, disinterested look, and then rolls his eyes* Prince. Right. Good luck with that.
IC!Ed: Which way do we go to get to this city of his?
OOC!Scar: *appalled that he is responsible for this new outbreak of singing* Yeah, could you give us directions?
SW: Some day when spring is here~ We'll find our love anew~ ...Oh. It's through the spooky woods somewhere in that direction, I believe. *points. somewhere*
IC!Ed: *looks in the direction pointed. studies it, brow furrowing.... shrugs* Alright. Let's go, Mal.
OOC!Scar: Right. Spooky woods it is. *hauling Ed along with him, heads away from the trilling teenaged princess*
SW: *trailing after them* You can't go! It's spooky!
IC!Ed: We'll be fine! Don't you worry your bow-tied little head about us! *walks faster. must... escape... the singing...*
SW: But you haven't eaten or had any tea!~ *pouts*
IC!Ed: *slows just slightly, ears perking. food?*
OOC!Scar: *still at that age where he could always do with a bit of food, and... as long as she's not singing...* We wouldn't want to ... impose. *hesitant*
SW: Oh, you wouldn't be imposing at all! *cheerfulcheerful*
IC!Ed: *appears to be seriously weighing the pros and cons of sticking around this girl just to eat with a grim look on his face*
OOC!Scar: *turning around* Well ... we aren't in that much of a hurry. Right, Ed?
IC!Ed: *makes a face and ruffles up his own hair* Well... Not really...
OOC!Scar: *is surrounded by a rush of excitedly twittering birds, all edging him and Ed towards the house*
Birds: *will probably peck their eyes out if they say no and hurt Snow White's feelings*
SW: *absolutely delighted* This way, this way~ *practically dances back to the house*
IC!Ed: *getting ushered back to the house by BIRDS wtf*
OOC!Scar: *follows after, standing up too soon after he gets in the door and banging his head on the roof* Motherfucker!
SW & Animals: *collective gasping*
SW: No, no, you can't say that here! *looking at Mal, horrified*
OOC!Scar: *chagrined, thinking that Clara would be ashamed* Sorry, sorry! *rubbing his head and wincing*
IC!Ed: *enters the house and lookit that, he fits in there nicely. has to snicker at Mal, though*
SW: Sit. *indicates a couple of chairs, kind of hovering over Mal to make sure he gets the more uncomfortable one for being such a potty mouth in her happy little house of singing and sickening sweetness*
OOC!Scar: *sitting in the tiny tiny chair and looking as though his legs are three times too long* So - er - Snow, how long have you lived here in the woods? *trying to make it up for the profanity*
SW: *hmphs, making tea* Months and months now. The Dwarves have been so kind to me, letting me stay here.
IC!Ed: *still snickering as he takes one of the seats and realizes with some measure of surprise that they're very small indeed, which means WOO he's taller than somebody!*
Deer: *brings a plate of cookies by, setting it on the table between Ed and Mal*
IC!Ed: *just sits there suddenly seeming a good deal more cheerful than before. takes a cookie and... inspects it first. a deer brought it over after all*
OOC!Scar: *eyes them suspiciously, but, hell, he's hungry, and takes one*
Deer: *only licked the plate, not the cookies*
OOC!Scar: *nom nom nom*
IC!Ed: *finally just eats it*
SW: *finishes up making tea, setting out a couple of cups and takes a seat, sitting primly, now back to her sweet self* So what brings you here? I haven't seen other people in ages...
OOC!Scar: *muttering* Hey, this is actually really good. Did you make these?
OOC!Scar: *takes another, DEVOURS*
SW: Yes, thank you. *beams*
IC!Ed: *in silent agreement, getting more for himself before Mal can beat him to it*
OOC!Scar: We're just ... uh, travellers.
IC!Ed: *nods, mouth sort of full* Yeah. Just going from one place to another.
SW: Oooh! *eyes go wide* Where do you hail from, then?
IC!Ed: ...The East. *gobbles more cookies*
SW: Ooh... *not sure what exactly is in the east, but it sounds important and mysterious and awesome*
OOC!Scar: *glances at Ed in surprise* I wouldn't call Central City the East, myself.
IC!Ed: *gives Mal a look* It's in the east.
OOC!Scar: *shrugs, having another cookie* This is - uh - a nice house. *a bit lamely*
SW: Oh thank you. The Dwarves built it. *sweet smile*
IC!Ed: *twitches, again with the dwarves*
OOC!Scar: Who are these dwarves you keep mentioning? *at least he doesn't talk with his mouth full*
SW: The seven Dwarves! I live with them. They let me stay with them when I had to leave the castle... *frowny face*
OOC!Scar: Castle? *a bit interested*
IC!Ed: *talking with mouth full HAHA* Why'd you leave?
SW: My wicked step mother was going to kill me and have my heart cut out. *says this is a quite happy voice, smiling*
OOC!Scar: *drops his cookie with a HOLY FUCK kind of expression*
IC!Ed: *stops. stares* ...What?
SW: She wanted to be the fairest in the land, and that was the only way. *shrugs*
OOC!Scar: That's - you aren't joking, are you? *still holding his hand in the air, not noticing the cookie is gone*
SW: Why would I jest about something like that? *blinkblink*
IC!Ed: *staring in horror* Why the hell didn't you get somebody to help you?? If someone's trying to kill you, you should be getting the police or the military or something to keep you safe!
OOC!Scar: That's ... awful! *horrified expression* So you ran away? Sh-- *catches himself before he swears again*
SW: *smiles sadly* She's the queen. No one could help me.
OOC!Scar: *struck with sudden, unexpected sympathy for the girl, which was surprising after all the fawning and singing and prudery* But, you're safe here, right?
IC!Ed: *narrows eyes slightly, grumbling to himself* What the hell kind of queen is that...?
SW: Of course I am! The Dwarves are protecting me and she has no reason to come out here, so...
OOC!Scar: *head whips around as someone knocks*
IC!Ed: *turns slightly to look over at the door*
EQ: *disguised as an old woman, carrying a basket of shiny red apples; had knocked on the door*
SW: *nearly has a panick attack, speaking in a rushed whisper* You have to hide! I'm not allowed to have people in..!
OOC!Scar: *stands abruptly, looking around for something to hide in, and settling on a very small wardrobe, rushing over to it*
IC!Ed: *surveys the room for something halfway decent to hide behind, settles for a corner near the fireplace... whoa, it's so clean*
SW: Hurry, hurry! *taking the extra tea cups and stuffing them in the seat, hurriedly making it look like she was the only one in*
EQ: *doot doot do, waiting*
SW: *makes sure that they're hidden before answering the door, surprised to not see the Dwarves, but the little old woman peddling apples instead*
OOC!Scar: *remains utterly quiet, pretzeled into the wardrobe and already starting to feel sore*
EQ: *beams a toothless grin, holding up the basket and croaking her words* Apples, my dearest~?
IC!Ed: *listening carefully to whatever's going on from his clean little hiding place*
SW: *not sure how to respond, smiling politely* Oh, I'm sorry, I don't have any money, ma'am...
EQ: Oh, that is a pity, but... *waves a gnarled hand dismissively* For some so pretty, may you have one free..~ *looks at Snow White slyly, hoping she'll fall for it*
IC!Ed: *suddenly sort of confused... don't only SW and the dwarves live around the area? toothless old lady is veryyy suspicious...*
SW: *is rather gullible and takes an offered apple, just a little flustered* Oh, thank you, ma'am...
OOC!Scar: *not really paying attention, trying not to sneeze with all his might as a few mothballs fall on his head*
EQ: Try it, try it~ I want to know what you think. It was plucked just this morning from my orchard. *watching the girl excitedly because, holy crap, she might finally be rid of the infernal singing*
IC!Ed: *still suspicious*
SW: Oh, yes, well... *looks at the apple a moment before giving a litlte shrug and taking a bite*
OOC!Scar: *wrinkles his nose, and then sneezes loudly - FUCK*
EQ: *watches on in anticipation*
SW: *swoons, dropping to the floor like a ton of bricks at the same moment as the sneeze*
EQ: *looks up sharply, pretty sure she heard something before looking down at Snow White, prodding her with the toe of a battered shoe before letting out a deranged cackle* Finally!
IC!Ed: *jumps a little bit at Mal's sneeze, and then oh shit a thud! narrows his eyes and tries to peer around the fireplace to see what happened*
OOC!Scar: *hadn't heard Snow White fall over the sneeze, but doesn't like the sound of that laugh, and opens the door to the wardrobe, staring at the bent old woman*
EQ: *stands their triumphantly a moment, savoring it* Stupid girl~ Now I'm the fairest of them all. *gives a little twirl, transforming out of that hideous old woman state*
OOC!Scar: *stares from the now-undisguised stately queen to the girl on the floor, and actually snarls* HEY!
IC!Ed: *WTF THAT'S NOT SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN. steps out from his hiding place* What the hell did you just do to her?!?!
EQ: *snaps her head up, face twisting in a smirk* Oh, she was entertaining~ How sweet. Unfortunately, your little friend is no more. *mock pouts, voice simpering before letting out a wicked laugh*
OOC!Scar: *dashes forward to pick up the limp Snow White - damn, is she light, she ought to eat more - and backing away from the queen*
IC!Ed: *narrows his eyes* Who the fuck are you?
OOC!Scar: It's the queen, Ed. It's her - fucking - evil - just get her out of here! *frantic*
EQ: I am the fairest in all the land. *laughs*
IC!Ed: *snorts, clenching a fist* Fairest my ass. You're just an evil fucking bitch! *chaaaaaaaaaarge~*
EQ: *whips around, throwing her cloak wide in an attempt to catch Ed in the face, bringing an elbow down hard at his back*
IC!Ed: *screeches to a halt when he sees the incoming cloak, quickly moves out of the way and throws a punch to her gut*
OOC!Scar: *assumes that Ed can take care of it, laying Snow White down and holding his hand over her mouth to see if she's breathing*
SW: *not breathing; for all intents and purposes, appearing to be dead*
EQ: *takes the blow to the gut, snatching a hand out to grab at Ed's braid and yank hard*
OOC!Scar: Shit. Shit. *feels quickly for a pulse and then starts to administer CPR - hooray for coming from a dimension where it's been invented! - folding his hands over one another and trying to get her heart going again*
IC!Ed: *braid yanked with a pained yelp* GAH!! Fuck- *swings a kick toward her head* LET GO!!!
OOC!Scar: *seeing no change, starts to panic, going to the next stage and bending over her, pinching her nose and breathing slowly into her mouth*
SW: *slowly opens her eyes at this, looking at Mal through a blury haze* ...Prince..?
EQ: *ducks under the kick, giving the braid another good, hard yank before letting go, fleeing with a mad cackle in the direction of the forest*
OOC!Scar: *backs away, still bent over her, eyes a little wide with disbelief that it actually worked* Are you OK? *breathlessly*
IC!Ed: *staggers backward upon being let go suddenly* Fuckin- GET BACK HERE! *races out after her*
SW: *beams groggily* Oh, my Prince...
EQ: *keeps running, not really wanting to get into this fight and more into getting back to the castle and gloating; is slowed down by all the dead looking branches from the trees, it being the spooky woods*
OOC!Scar: *lets out a shaky breath, getting his knees more properly under him and sitting up* Oh, thank Ish-- anyway, Ed's gone after her.
EQ: *and where the hell did that storm come from?*
SW: *sits up slowly... and then latches onto Mal* Oh, thank you, thank you, my Prince! I've been waiting for you for so long!
IC!Ed: *chasing the Evil Bitch down, wtf weird weather and spooky woods*
EQ: *oh hai look, a mountain path. let's go up that!*
OOC!Scar: *his sunglasses are knocked askew by the vehement embrace, and he lets out a startled squawk* Whaaa-?
SW: You're my Prince! You saved me with True Love's kiss!
IC!Ed: GET BACK HERE YOU CRAZY BITCH!!! *chases up the mountain*
EQ: NEVER! *cackles wildly; makes it pretty high up on the mountain until... fuck. dead end*
OOC!Scar: Uh... uh... I think there's. Uh. Some kind of misunderstanding. I didn't kiss- I was just - resuscitation technique - *feels his ears getting hot, tries to get the girl's arms from around his chest*
SW: *is never, ever going to let go, clinging to him tighter and nuzzling at his arm* We can get married and live in the castle and have five children!
IC!Ed: *still climbing up after her, it's damn rocky over here*
OOC!Scar: Uh ... I'm flattered, Snow, I really am, but I think you've got me wrong, here. I don't want to get married, and we just met, and ... Eeeeddd? *calling out hopefully, trying in vain to get free*
EQ: *whips around as lightning flashes behind her and thunder crashses, generally being dramatic*
SW: *gives him a look like he not only just smashed her heart into a million pieces but then danced over it too* B-but...
OOC!Scar: *grimaces, feeling as though he just kicked a puppy but still very uncomfortable with this whole hugging business* Are you sure you're feeling alright? What did she do to you? *maybe changing the subject will work?*
IC!Ed: *wow, the weather is seriously weird right now. close enough now to see that the EQ is trapped at a dead end. smirks slightly* Nowhere to run now, is there?
SW: *it works* I bit that apple over there and then... I can't remember anything after that. *lets go of him with one arm in order to point out where the apple had fallen*
EQ: I do not need to run. Here will be a good place to kill you. *smirks before launching herself at him*
OOC!Scar: *takes this opportunity to try again to slip out of her hold* It was probably poisoned.
SW: *nodnod* ...Can we go to the castle now? *looks up at him with wide eyes*
IC!Ed: *ends up grappling with the EQ, not having the footroom to properly dodge, snarling and trying to push her away* I don't think so.
EQ: *keeps a tight hold on him, though loses some of her footing in the mud, moving closer to the edge of the cliff, snarling all the while*
IC!Ed: *grapple grapple, looks around, oh shit, hello cliff edge of doom. tries to get better traction on the ground by digging the heel of his automail into the mud*
EQ: *loses one foot over the side of the cliff, clutching harder at Ed and clawing at him viciously, determined to take him down with her should she fall*
OOC!Scar: The - uh - the castle? *nervously*
IC!Ed: *slightly preoccupied with struggling to keep himself on firmer ground, gritting his teeth and digging his heel deeper into the mud*
SW: Of course! We'll get to live in the castle! *humming happily to herself*
EQ: *still grappling, kind of flails a little as she nearly topples over the edge, other foot about to give out and grip loosening*
OOC!Scar: Uhh... Ed and I need to get back home. We're not... staying. I'm sorry.
SW: ...I can go back home with you. To your castle.
OOC!Scar: I don't have a castle. *bluntly, but with the beginnings of an awkward smile*
SW: *smiles happily* Then we'll just have to get one.
IC!Ed: *oh shit, getting really slippery and starting to lose his grip on her, too. wants to throw an arm out and reach for something sturdy to grab onto* Fuck...!
EQ: *does lose her footing completely this time, tumbling over the edge of the cliff and reaching out to grab at one of Ed's legs to keep herself from falling, letting out an enraged shriek*
OOC!Scar: *gnawing on the inside of his bottom lip, starting to become worried about Ed not being back yet, the storm reaching the cottage with vehemence and thundering against the windows*
IC!Ed: *gets his right leg grabbed, making him slip and fall onto his back with a yell. quickly reaches out to grab hold of a rock or something to keep himself from falling over the edge*
EQ: *tries to use the hold she has on his leg to climb back up the cliffside, feet scrabbling and slipping on the rocky surface*
IC!Ed: *flailing his legs a little bit because DAMMIT BITCH IS HEAVY, clinging tightly to a giant rock*
EQ: *still struggling; almost... there... oh hello there wildlife; has to stop and stare because that is so odd*
Posse of Wildlife: *HAS COME TO RESUE YOU, YAY*
IC!Ed: *hasn't noticed the animals yet and whoops, hold on the rock slips! scrabbles to grab something else before he's totally over the edge*
Badger: *leaps out, latching onto the evil queen's wrist with its teeth*
EQ: *lets out a yelp, letting of Ed's ankle and sliiiiding through the mud and down the cliffside, screaming as she falls*
IC!Ed: *stops sliding when the weight from his leg is lifted, blinks in confusion as he scrambles to get himself onto all fours and peer over the edge of the cliff* ...shit...
Badger: *kind of shuffles off triumphantly, having let go before he could be pulled over*
OOC!Scar: *seriously worried about Ed now - he wouldn't have taken an apple, right?*
IC!Ed: *stares for a little while longer before finally getting to his feet and heading back to the little cottage place*
SW: *still sitting there vapidly; moves to latch onto Mal again*
OOC!Scar: *EEP, ears go red, tries to wriggle free* Seriously. I can't marry you.
SW: Why not..?
IC!Ed: *victorious arrival, all dirty and disheveled. pauses in the doorway, to stare at Mal being latched onto by Snow White, blinking in surprise*
OOC!Scar: Well ... uh ... I'm kind of ... In love with someone else
OOC!Scar: *turns to stare at Ed in UTTER HORROR, oh the timing*
SW: ............... *stares at him aghast* WHAT?!
IC!Ed: *stares* .......
IC!Ed: *slooooooow smiiiiiirk. oh, the poor bastard*
OOC!Scar: *winces, his eardrums which are already abused from a lifelong love of loud music throbbing*
SW: WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU'RE IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE ELSE?! YOU CAN'T BE! I'M YOUR TRUE LOVE!
OOC!Scar: Hi, Ed. *intensely uncomfortable with this situation, especially since he can just SEE that look on Ed's face, and wants to smack him for it*
OOC!Scar: *winces, OW OW OW TOO LOUD*
IC!Ed: *ohhhh how he wants to laugh. he wants to laugh soooo much*
OOC!Scar: Ed - help me - quick! *almost drowned out by the shrieking*
SW: *death glares at Ed* HE CAN'T HELP YOU! TELL ME WHAT YOU MEAN?!
Posse of Wildlife: *slowly decending in a menacing fashion up Mal and Ed*
OOC!Scar: I - don't - *struggling to get free* What? What part of that don't you get? Look, I'm glad you're OK, and I'm - flattered, I guess, that you think you're in love with me but - shiiiit *glancing at the encroaching posse* But -
IC!Ed: *blinks, WOW that shrill sound hurts... and holy shit, the cutesy animals are vicious now* Mal... guitar?
Posse of Wildlife: *circling now and that deer kind of looks like it has rabies*
OOC!Scar: *already thinking that, trying to twist his arms at least so he can reach the neck, nodding Ed over, before realizing that Snow White, too, would be transported if he tried to get away now; thinking at light speed*
IC!Ed: *moving closer to Mal* Sheesh, I save everyone's lives and this is the thanks I get... Go figure.
OOC!Scar: Ok! OK! I was lying! I'm not in love with someone else, I'll marry you.
OOC!Scar: *shoots Ed a work-with-me kind of glance*
SW: *instantly beams* Oh, wonderful~ We'll get married right now!
Posse of Wildlife: *setting: adorable*
IC!Ed: *raises an eyebrow at Mal, then gives a tiny nod of his head. wow that worked well*
OOC!Scar: *stammering a little, heart racing* Y-yes, well, you see ... where I come from, the man has to propose first, right? And... and to do that I have to play you a song. Would you let go so I can play you a love song - er - my dear?
OOC!Scar: *grinds his teeth, knowing Ed will never let him hear the end of this*
IC!Ed: *this is Ed's steely face. not gonna snicker. yet*
IC!Ed: It's true. You need to let him play.
SW: *blushes brightly, absolutely flattered, and lets him go* Of course!
OOC!Scar: *gets shakily away, pulling up a chair and indicating she should sit*
SW: *practically prances over to the chair, sitting primly*
OOC!Scar: *clears his throat, beckoning Ed closer and pulling his guitar in front of him, tuning it - how had it managed to get so out of whack?*
IC!Ed: *still near Mal, discreetly grabbing onto his right shoulder*
OOC!Scar: *hisses* Lower, man, go for the elbow. *out loud* And now... *gets the pick from his pocket, setting his fingers aright*
SW: *kind of glares at Ed; how dare he touch her fiance, hmph*
IC!Ed: *adjusts accordingly, ignoring the glare*
OOC!Scar: ...SEE YA. *draws the pick across the strings almost viciously, and is gratified by the massive looming of the Gate and the force that is propelling them towards Central once more, though it does make his arm hurt quite a bit...*
SW: WHAT..?! *stands up as they disappear, staring at the spot they were once at before breaking down into sobs because her prince DITCHED her; feel the pain through the universe, ho*
IC!Ed: *clenches his jaw when he sees the Gate and closes his eyes... and next thing he knows, they've successfully jumped dimensions*
OOC!Scar: *sets down his guitar and backpack with relief and instantly flops backwards over his clothes-strewn bed with a huge sigh*
IC!Ed: *falls back on his butt on the floor near the bed, leaning against the edge of it*
OOC!Scar: *drawn-out* Fuuuuu-uuuck.
OOC!Scar: *tilting his head up a bit* Shit, you're soaked. What happened?
IC!Ed: *shrugs* Fought that crazy queen on top of a mountain in the rain. ...She fell.
OOC!Scar: *too shocked at it all to be surprised, just makes a small noise of acknowledgment* I just - I resuscitated her, right...
OOC!Scar: ... And then she starts going on about how I'm her prince or some shit. Crazy bitch. *ears still ringing from the shrieking*
IC!Ed: *snickers*
IC!Ed: "Prince Mal"...? *snorts*
OOC!Scar: *rolls his eyes* I know, I know... *clears his throat, his thoughts filled with the memory of the smirk Ed was wearing when he walked in - when he heard - * Anyway. We know it works, now.
IC!Ed: *still snickering, extremely amused* Yeah, we do.
OOC!Scar: *lets the silence reign, just catching his breath still, kicking off his shoes*
IC!Ed: *smirks again* ...So what're you gonna do when the girl you're really in love with finds out about how you got nice and cozy with another girl?
OOC!Scar: *jumps out of his skin, sliding off the bed and to the floor with an undignified noise and plenty of flailing* Shut it.
OOC!Scar: She's - it's not - *incoherent*
IC!Ed: *bursts out laughing*
OOC!Scar: *grumbles under his breath* We weren't cozy. She was psychotic, I swear. *running a hand through his hair*
OOC!Scar: You didn't hear a thing, you hear? I don't want you to talk about or ... trying to get me to say who it is ... or anything! *vehement*
IC!Ed: *teasing grin* I dunno, Mal. It did sort of seem like you were enjoying it for a minute there. You should've seen the look on your face... *snickers some more*
OOC!Scar: *ears burning* Shut up, man.
OOC!Scar: *after a moment, slaps Ed on the shoulder and sighs once more* Damn it ... I tell you, Ed, after that .... I never want to see a squirrel or a rabbit ever again.
IC!Ed: *takes a moment to calm down, then leans back with a tired sigh* I second that.
When: 02/22/08
Rating: PG
Category: Side Plots
Summary: Mal and Ed test out whether the guitar method of dimension-shifting works for multiple people at once, and visit the wonderful world of Disney.
Other: The makers of this log recommend that you watch the first six minutes (or however long you can stand) of this video, before beginning to read the log, to remind you just how annoying that singing voice really is.
OOC!Scar: *waiting for Ed to show up at his room in Clara's place, his guitar all plugged in and a backpack slung over his shoulder, full of things he thinks will be useful in almost any situation; chocolate bars, some rope, matches, a bowl, paper and a pencil, something resembling a rudimentary Swiss army knife, and two canteens of water*
IC!Ed: *is being sneaky about getting to Mal's room since he's sort of avoiding Clara. finally gets there and knocks before opening the door and stepping inside* ...You all set?
OOC!Scar: *looking up with a companionable smile, though he can tell that Ed's still feeling like shit, sitting cross-legged on the floor* Yeah, I think I'm good to go. Except... you know this is probably not gonna work?
IC!Ed: *closes the door behind him and moves to stand next to him* I know that. Sure as hell worth a shot, though.
OOC!Scar: Fuck, man, that's what I thought. *patting the floor on his right side to indicate Ed should sit down, then going about tuning his guitar*
IC!Ed: *raises an eyebrow before sitting in the offered spot, watching Mal work*
OOC!Scar: *sitting up straight when he's done* Alright... why don't you try grabbing hold to my arm - the right one - since I'm pretty sure... Well. I think my tattoo's got somethin' to do with how it works.
IC!Ed: *just gives him a look that seems to say "are you fucking kidding me?"*
OOC!Scar: *biting the inside of his lip* What?! * a bit snappier than he intended*
IC!Ed: *continues to just look at him for a moment, then rolls his eyes and grabs onto Mal's right arm* Never mind. Just- do it.
OOC!Scar: *still feeling uneasy about that little exchange, but puts his fingers onto the right strings for the chord, and draws the pick down over the strings, rather feebly. Nothing happens*
IC!Ed: ... *deadpans* Wow. This dimension looks exactly Clara's house. *sighs* I thought you said something about blasting it as loud as possible?
OOC!Scar: *shakes his head slightly, trying to get his mind in the right place* Yeah, yeah, fuck, I know. I just have to get my head in the right place. *closes his eyes for a moment and exhales, pressing his fingers so hard against the strings that they bite into his calluses* Hold on tight
IC!Ed: *nods and grips tight with both hands, just in case interdimensional travel wants to separate his automail from the rest of his body*
OOC!Scar: *slams the pick down across the strings with his eyes still closed, almost in a trance but focusing hard on the cinching feel of Ed's hand on his arm; knows it has worked as soon as he does it*
IC!Ed: *ends up shutting his eyes as he braces himself for... whatever is going to happen. cautiously peels his eyes open one at a time after a moment to see what's happened*
OOC!Scar: *opens his eyes just a moment later, in time to see the massive Gate disappearing back to wherever it goes, drawing in a bit of a gasp when he realizes it has worked* Oh, fuck yeah! *jumping to his feet and whirling around to examine the surroundings*
SW: *whistling as she works, airing out the little log cabin that she shares with the Dwarves
SW: *pauses only a moment to take the time to dance with a sheet, mooning over it* Some day my prince will come..~ *sparkly, sad eyes*
IC!Ed: *blinks, looking around them as he gets back to his feet. it's so... woodsy* ...Shit. Either it worked or we've both lost our minds. ...Is someone singing?
OOC!Scar: *with a horror-struck face* I - I think so, but ... did you just see that? *going a bit pale under his dark skin* I swear, I just saw like ... twenty squirrels and rabbits go running that way. *points towards the shrill singing*
20 Squirrels & Rabbits: *reach the cabin, sighing in dreamy manners as Snow White dances with the sheet*
OOC!Scar: *jumps out of the way as a bright-eyed skunk goes tearing past, slinging his guitar over his shoulder cautiously*
IC!Ed: *staring after said woodland creatures* ...What the hell is going on...? And please tell me it involves staying away from the singing.
SW: *high pitched warbling* We'll find our love anew...~ And the birds will sing...~ *and birds do in fact sing*
OOC!Scar: *nervous giggles* What? What, you're scared, huh? *mischievous look* Where's your sense of adventure, man?
IC!Ed: *mild glare* Like hell I am. That voice is just... really annoying.
SW: *gets more annoying as she reverts back to whistling and cleaning, making up one of the beds with the sheet*
OOC!Scar: *rubbing his hands together* Come on, just for a minute... *shifting his backpack on his back and then setting off towards the whistling, glimpsing a small house through the trees* ....the hell? *whispering to himself*
IC!Ed: *rolls his eyes, unable to believe he's actually going to follow Mal toward the stupid singing. spots the house as well, raising an eyebrow* That must be where it's coming from.
OOC!Scar: *nodding and creeping closer, around the back of the house*
IC!Ed: *really not looking forward to seeing whoever is making all that high pitched noise*
SW: *heading outside, followed by a deer who is helping her clean various bits of tableware; stops singing, startled by the presence of the other two and only vaguely wondering if perhaps one could be her prince*
OOC!Scar: *holds his hands up in the air in a gesture of peace, since the girl with the red bow in her hair looks so startled and made such a very girlish and terrifying noise*
IC!Ed: *just gives her a look like she's a total freak, hands in his pockets*
SW: *not really sure what to say, so blurts out the first thing that pops into her mind* ....The Dwarves shouldn't be back for another few hours! Shouldn't you be at the mines? *staring pointedly at Ed*
IC!Ed: *EYE TICK, suddenly waving his fists in the air at her* WHO THE HELL'RE YOU CALLIN' A DWARF?!?!?!?!
OOC!Scar: *quickly stifles a laugh, trying to pass it off as a cough and convulsing with a series of fake coughs*
SW: *jumps back, startled, getting ready to brandish the nearby broom should she need to at the rabid dwarf* ...Gr-grumpy..?
OOC!Scar: *starts to convulse even more, staggering over and supporting his weight against the house, laughing outright, now*
IC!Ed: *glares* WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU, I'M NOT A DWARF!!! *aims a punch at Mal's shoulder since he's closer and not a girl and he's LAUGHING wtf*
SW: *SO. CONFUSED.* B-but you're so short..!
OOC!Scar: *is punched without protest, wiping tears from his eyes and pushing off the wall to regain his balance*
OOC!Scar: *almost succumbs to the laughter again, reaching forward and grabbing Ed by the shoulder to restrain him from anything he might regret*
IC!Ed: *cannot pounce since Mal's grabbed onto him, so opts for giving the GLARE AND SNARL OF DOOM* I. AM NOT. SHORT.
OOC!Scar: Ed, chill. Who are you? *speaking to the strange girl*
SW: *backs up, grabbing the broom* A-alright, you're not a Dwarf! You're not, okay?!
SW: *looks to Mal, not sure what to say in case he freaks out too* ...S-Snow White. ...And who are you?
OOC!Scar: *shortly, still restraining Ed* My name's Mal. This is Ed.
IC!Ed: *still glaring, folding his arms over his chest and grumbling maliciously under his breath about stupid looking girls with annoying high pitched voices*
SW: *catches that and narrows her eyes, but otherwise pretends not to have heard; she is much taller after all, and could probably take him if she had to*
SW: *smiles in a syrupy fashion at Mal, trilling* Pleased to meet you~
OOC!Scar: *let's go of Ed cautiously, but can't help the slight widening of his eyes at the trilling greeting* Uh, yeah. You too.
IC!Ed: *snorts and rolls his eyes*
SW: *peers down at Ed* Young man, you're looking awfully... angry. With a smile and a song..~ *from somewhere in the background, music starts to pick up, mostly from a chorus of birds*
IC!Ed: *eyes go wide in horror, HOLY SHIT, she's singing again*
OOC!Scar: *whirling around, looking for the source of the music*
SW: *carries on, music getting louder as she gathers force* Life is just like a bright sun~ny day~ Your cares fade a~way~ And your heart is young~
IC!Ed: *gives Mal a look like "MAKE HER STOP"*
OOC!Scar: *backing away slowly, stumbles over a discarded pick-axe and falls head over heels with a muffled shout into the dusty road*
SW: *stops aruptly* Oh my goodness, are you okay?!
OOC!Scar: *instantly surrounded by a mob of fawning, concerned rabbits and chipmunks and chickadees, is momentarily speechless*
IC!Ed: *goes over to help Mal up, shooing the animals and offering a hand* Sheesh, what the hell're all these pick axes doing lying around your front yard, lady? *secretly glad the singing was interrupted*
SW: Oh those belong to the -- *pauses a moment, looking at Ed in a vapid, sweet manner* -- Dwarves.
OOC!Scar: *scrabbling for his feet, making sure his guitar is unharmed first off and then brushing dust from his clothes* 'm fine.
IC!Ed: *returns the sweet look with yet another glare*
SW: Oh goodness, are you sure you're okay?
OOC!Scar: *clears his throat, trying to ease the tension, is startled by the continued inquiry and the intensity of her shiny, vapid gaze* I'm really sure. So, are there any cities near here?
IC!Ed: Or any place that even remotely looks like it has people and not... squirrels living in it?
SW: Cities..? Goodness, no... The nearest one is so far away... *sighs dreamily, music starting to rise again* Some day, my prince will come..~ *music dies* Maybe from that city.
OOC!Scar: *elbows Ed covertly, but has to suppress a smirk*
OOC!Scar: Prince? *blurts, before he realizes prompting her might be a bad thing*
SW: *and there goes the music again* Some day we'll meet again~ And away to his castle we'll go~ To be happy forever I know~
IC!Ed: *actually does smirk at the elbowing* Like you weren't thinking it. *turns to give SW a blank, disinterested look, and then rolls his eyes* Prince. Right. Good luck with that.
IC!Ed: Which way do we go to get to this city of his?
OOC!Scar: *appalled that he is responsible for this new outbreak of singing* Yeah, could you give us directions?
SW: Some day when spring is here~ We'll find our love anew~ ...Oh. It's through the spooky woods somewhere in that direction, I believe. *points. somewhere*
IC!Ed: *looks in the direction pointed. studies it, brow furrowing.... shrugs* Alright. Let's go, Mal.
OOC!Scar: Right. Spooky woods it is. *hauling Ed along with him, heads away from the trilling teenaged princess*
SW: *trailing after them* You can't go! It's spooky!
IC!Ed: We'll be fine! Don't you worry your bow-tied little head about us! *walks faster. must... escape... the singing...*
SW: But you haven't eaten or had any tea!~ *pouts*
IC!Ed: *slows just slightly, ears perking. food?*
OOC!Scar: *still at that age where he could always do with a bit of food, and... as long as she's not singing...* We wouldn't want to ... impose. *hesitant*
SW: Oh, you wouldn't be imposing at all! *cheerfulcheerful*
IC!Ed: *appears to be seriously weighing the pros and cons of sticking around this girl just to eat with a grim look on his face*
OOC!Scar: *turning around* Well ... we aren't in that much of a hurry. Right, Ed?
IC!Ed: *makes a face and ruffles up his own hair* Well... Not really...
OOC!Scar: *is surrounded by a rush of excitedly twittering birds, all edging him and Ed towards the house*
Birds: *will probably peck their eyes out if they say no and hurt Snow White's feelings*
SW: *absolutely delighted* This way, this way~ *practically dances back to the house*
IC!Ed: *getting ushered back to the house by BIRDS wtf*
OOC!Scar: *follows after, standing up too soon after he gets in the door and banging his head on the roof* Motherfucker!
SW & Animals: *collective gasping*
SW: No, no, you can't say that here! *looking at Mal, horrified*
OOC!Scar: *chagrined, thinking that Clara would be ashamed* Sorry, sorry! *rubbing his head and wincing*
IC!Ed: *enters the house and lookit that, he fits in there nicely. has to snicker at Mal, though*
SW: Sit. *indicates a couple of chairs, kind of hovering over Mal to make sure he gets the more uncomfortable one for being such a potty mouth in her happy little house of singing and sickening sweetness*
OOC!Scar: *sitting in the tiny tiny chair and looking as though his legs are three times too long* So - er - Snow, how long have you lived here in the woods? *trying to make it up for the profanity*
SW: *hmphs, making tea* Months and months now. The Dwarves have been so kind to me, letting me stay here.
IC!Ed: *still snickering as he takes one of the seats and realizes with some measure of surprise that they're very small indeed, which means WOO he's taller than somebody!*
Deer: *brings a plate of cookies by, setting it on the table between Ed and Mal*
IC!Ed: *just sits there suddenly seeming a good deal more cheerful than before. takes a cookie and... inspects it first. a deer brought it over after all*
OOC!Scar: *eyes them suspiciously, but, hell, he's hungry, and takes one*
Deer: *only licked the plate, not the cookies*
OOC!Scar: *nom nom nom*
IC!Ed: *finally just eats it*
SW: *finishes up making tea, setting out a couple of cups and takes a seat, sitting primly, now back to her sweet self* So what brings you here? I haven't seen other people in ages...
OOC!Scar: *muttering* Hey, this is actually really good. Did you make these?
OOC!Scar: *takes another, DEVOURS*
SW: Yes, thank you. *beams*
IC!Ed: *in silent agreement, getting more for himself before Mal can beat him to it*
OOC!Scar: We're just ... uh, travellers.
IC!Ed: *nods, mouth sort of full* Yeah. Just going from one place to another.
SW: Oooh! *eyes go wide* Where do you hail from, then?
IC!Ed: ...The East. *gobbles more cookies*
SW: Ooh... *not sure what exactly is in the east, but it sounds important and mysterious and awesome*
OOC!Scar: *glances at Ed in surprise* I wouldn't call Central City the East, myself.
IC!Ed: *gives Mal a look* It's in the east.
OOC!Scar: *shrugs, having another cookie* This is - uh - a nice house. *a bit lamely*
SW: Oh thank you. The Dwarves built it. *sweet smile*
IC!Ed: *twitches, again with the dwarves*
OOC!Scar: Who are these dwarves you keep mentioning? *at least he doesn't talk with his mouth full*
SW: The seven Dwarves! I live with them. They let me stay with them when I had to leave the castle... *frowny face*
OOC!Scar: Castle? *a bit interested*
IC!Ed: *talking with mouth full HAHA* Why'd you leave?
SW: My wicked step mother was going to kill me and have my heart cut out. *says this is a quite happy voice, smiling*
OOC!Scar: *drops his cookie with a HOLY FUCK kind of expression*
IC!Ed: *stops. stares* ...What?
SW: She wanted to be the fairest in the land, and that was the only way. *shrugs*
OOC!Scar: That's - you aren't joking, are you? *still holding his hand in the air, not noticing the cookie is gone*
SW: Why would I jest about something like that? *blinkblink*
IC!Ed: *staring in horror* Why the hell didn't you get somebody to help you?? If someone's trying to kill you, you should be getting the police or the military or something to keep you safe!
OOC!Scar: That's ... awful! *horrified expression* So you ran away? Sh-- *catches himself before he swears again*
SW: *smiles sadly* She's the queen. No one could help me.
OOC!Scar: *struck with sudden, unexpected sympathy for the girl, which was surprising after all the fawning and singing and prudery* But, you're safe here, right?
IC!Ed: *narrows eyes slightly, grumbling to himself* What the hell kind of queen is that...?
SW: Of course I am! The Dwarves are protecting me and she has no reason to come out here, so...
OOC!Scar: *head whips around as someone knocks*
IC!Ed: *turns slightly to look over at the door*
EQ: *disguised as an old woman, carrying a basket of shiny red apples; had knocked on the door*
SW: *nearly has a panick attack, speaking in a rushed whisper* You have to hide! I'm not allowed to have people in..!
OOC!Scar: *stands abruptly, looking around for something to hide in, and settling on a very small wardrobe, rushing over to it*
IC!Ed: *surveys the room for something halfway decent to hide behind, settles for a corner near the fireplace... whoa, it's so clean*
SW: Hurry, hurry! *taking the extra tea cups and stuffing them in the seat, hurriedly making it look like she was the only one in*
EQ: *doot doot do, waiting*
SW: *makes sure that they're hidden before answering the door, surprised to not see the Dwarves, but the little old woman peddling apples instead*
OOC!Scar: *remains utterly quiet, pretzeled into the wardrobe and already starting to feel sore*
EQ: *beams a toothless grin, holding up the basket and croaking her words* Apples, my dearest~?
IC!Ed: *listening carefully to whatever's going on from his clean little hiding place*
SW: *not sure how to respond, smiling politely* Oh, I'm sorry, I don't have any money, ma'am...
EQ: Oh, that is a pity, but... *waves a gnarled hand dismissively* For some so pretty, may you have one free..~ *looks at Snow White slyly, hoping she'll fall for it*
IC!Ed: *suddenly sort of confused... don't only SW and the dwarves live around the area? toothless old lady is veryyy suspicious...*
SW: *is rather gullible and takes an offered apple, just a little flustered* Oh, thank you, ma'am...
OOC!Scar: *not really paying attention, trying not to sneeze with all his might as a few mothballs fall on his head*
EQ: Try it, try it~ I want to know what you think. It was plucked just this morning from my orchard. *watching the girl excitedly because, holy crap, she might finally be rid of the infernal singing*
IC!Ed: *still suspicious*
SW: Oh, yes, well... *looks at the apple a moment before giving a litlte shrug and taking a bite*
OOC!Scar: *wrinkles his nose, and then sneezes loudly - FUCK*
EQ: *watches on in anticipation*
SW: *swoons, dropping to the floor like a ton of bricks at the same moment as the sneeze*
EQ: *looks up sharply, pretty sure she heard something before looking down at Snow White, prodding her with the toe of a battered shoe before letting out a deranged cackle* Finally!
IC!Ed: *jumps a little bit at Mal's sneeze, and then oh shit a thud! narrows his eyes and tries to peer around the fireplace to see what happened*
OOC!Scar: *hadn't heard Snow White fall over the sneeze, but doesn't like the sound of that laugh, and opens the door to the wardrobe, staring at the bent old woman*
EQ: *stands their triumphantly a moment, savoring it* Stupid girl~ Now I'm the fairest of them all. *gives a little twirl, transforming out of that hideous old woman state*
OOC!Scar: *stares from the now-undisguised stately queen to the girl on the floor, and actually snarls* HEY!
IC!Ed: *WTF THAT'S NOT SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN. steps out from his hiding place* What the hell did you just do to her?!?!
EQ: *snaps her head up, face twisting in a smirk* Oh, she was entertaining~ How sweet. Unfortunately, your little friend is no more. *mock pouts, voice simpering before letting out a wicked laugh*
OOC!Scar: *dashes forward to pick up the limp Snow White - damn, is she light, she ought to eat more - and backing away from the queen*
IC!Ed: *narrows his eyes* Who the fuck are you?
OOC!Scar: It's the queen, Ed. It's her - fucking - evil - just get her out of here! *frantic*
EQ: I am the fairest in all the land. *laughs*
IC!Ed: *snorts, clenching a fist* Fairest my ass. You're just an evil fucking bitch! *chaaaaaaaaaarge~*
EQ: *whips around, throwing her cloak wide in an attempt to catch Ed in the face, bringing an elbow down hard at his back*
IC!Ed: *screeches to a halt when he sees the incoming cloak, quickly moves out of the way and throws a punch to her gut*
OOC!Scar: *assumes that Ed can take care of it, laying Snow White down and holding his hand over her mouth to see if she's breathing*
SW: *not breathing; for all intents and purposes, appearing to be dead*
EQ: *takes the blow to the gut, snatching a hand out to grab at Ed's braid and yank hard*
OOC!Scar: Shit. Shit. *feels quickly for a pulse and then starts to administer CPR - hooray for coming from a dimension where it's been invented! - folding his hands over one another and trying to get her heart going again*
IC!Ed: *braid yanked with a pained yelp* GAH!! Fuck- *swings a kick toward her head* LET GO!!!
OOC!Scar: *seeing no change, starts to panic, going to the next stage and bending over her, pinching her nose and breathing slowly into her mouth*
SW: *slowly opens her eyes at this, looking at Mal through a blury haze* ...Prince..?
EQ: *ducks under the kick, giving the braid another good, hard yank before letting go, fleeing with a mad cackle in the direction of the forest*
OOC!Scar: *backs away, still bent over her, eyes a little wide with disbelief that it actually worked* Are you OK? *breathlessly*
IC!Ed: *staggers backward upon being let go suddenly* Fuckin- GET BACK HERE! *races out after her*
SW: *beams groggily* Oh, my Prince...
EQ: *keeps running, not really wanting to get into this fight and more into getting back to the castle and gloating; is slowed down by all the dead looking branches from the trees, it being the spooky woods*
OOC!Scar: *lets out a shaky breath, getting his knees more properly under him and sitting up* Oh, thank Ish-- anyway, Ed's gone after her.
EQ: *and where the hell did that storm come from?*
SW: *sits up slowly... and then latches onto Mal* Oh, thank you, thank you, my Prince! I've been waiting for you for so long!
IC!Ed: *chasing the Evil Bitch down, wtf weird weather and spooky woods*
EQ: *oh hai look, a mountain path. let's go up that!*
OOC!Scar: *his sunglasses are knocked askew by the vehement embrace, and he lets out a startled squawk* Whaaa-?
SW: You're my Prince! You saved me with True Love's kiss!
IC!Ed: GET BACK HERE YOU CRAZY BITCH!!! *chases up the mountain*
EQ: NEVER! *cackles wildly; makes it pretty high up on the mountain until... fuck. dead end*
OOC!Scar: Uh... uh... I think there's. Uh. Some kind of misunderstanding. I didn't kiss- I was just - resuscitation technique - *feels his ears getting hot, tries to get the girl's arms from around his chest*
SW: *is never, ever going to let go, clinging to him tighter and nuzzling at his arm* We can get married and live in the castle and have five children!
IC!Ed: *still climbing up after her, it's damn rocky over here*
OOC!Scar: Uh ... I'm flattered, Snow, I really am, but I think you've got me wrong, here. I don't want to get married, and we just met, and ... Eeeeddd? *calling out hopefully, trying in vain to get free*
EQ: *whips around as lightning flashes behind her and thunder crashses, generally being dramatic*
SW: *gives him a look like he not only just smashed her heart into a million pieces but then danced over it too* B-but...
OOC!Scar: *grimaces, feeling as though he just kicked a puppy but still very uncomfortable with this whole hugging business* Are you sure you're feeling alright? What did she do to you? *maybe changing the subject will work?*
IC!Ed: *wow, the weather is seriously weird right now. close enough now to see that the EQ is trapped at a dead end. smirks slightly* Nowhere to run now, is there?
SW: *it works* I bit that apple over there and then... I can't remember anything after that. *lets go of him with one arm in order to point out where the apple had fallen*
EQ: I do not need to run. Here will be a good place to kill you. *smirks before launching herself at him*
OOC!Scar: *takes this opportunity to try again to slip out of her hold* It was probably poisoned.
SW: *nodnod* ...Can we go to the castle now? *looks up at him with wide eyes*
IC!Ed: *ends up grappling with the EQ, not having the footroom to properly dodge, snarling and trying to push her away* I don't think so.
EQ: *keeps a tight hold on him, though loses some of her footing in the mud, moving closer to the edge of the cliff, snarling all the while*
IC!Ed: *grapple grapple, looks around, oh shit, hello cliff edge of doom. tries to get better traction on the ground by digging the heel of his automail into the mud*
EQ: *loses one foot over the side of the cliff, clutching harder at Ed and clawing at him viciously, determined to take him down with her should she fall*
OOC!Scar: The - uh - the castle? *nervously*
IC!Ed: *slightly preoccupied with struggling to keep himself on firmer ground, gritting his teeth and digging his heel deeper into the mud*
SW: Of course! We'll get to live in the castle! *humming happily to herself*
EQ: *still grappling, kind of flails a little as she nearly topples over the edge, other foot about to give out and grip loosening*
OOC!Scar: Uhh... Ed and I need to get back home. We're not... staying. I'm sorry.
SW: ...I can go back home with you. To your castle.
OOC!Scar: I don't have a castle. *bluntly, but with the beginnings of an awkward smile*
SW: *smiles happily* Then we'll just have to get one.
IC!Ed: *oh shit, getting really slippery and starting to lose his grip on her, too. wants to throw an arm out and reach for something sturdy to grab onto* Fuck...!
EQ: *does lose her footing completely this time, tumbling over the edge of the cliff and reaching out to grab at one of Ed's legs to keep herself from falling, letting out an enraged shriek*
OOC!Scar: *gnawing on the inside of his bottom lip, starting to become worried about Ed not being back yet, the storm reaching the cottage with vehemence and thundering against the windows*
IC!Ed: *gets his right leg grabbed, making him slip and fall onto his back with a yell. quickly reaches out to grab hold of a rock or something to keep himself from falling over the edge*
EQ: *tries to use the hold she has on his leg to climb back up the cliffside, feet scrabbling and slipping on the rocky surface*
IC!Ed: *flailing his legs a little bit because DAMMIT BITCH IS HEAVY, clinging tightly to a giant rock*
EQ: *still struggling; almost... there... oh hello there wildlife; has to stop and stare because that is so odd*
Posse of Wildlife: *HAS COME TO RESUE YOU, YAY*
IC!Ed: *hasn't noticed the animals yet and whoops, hold on the rock slips! scrabbles to grab something else before he's totally over the edge*
Badger: *leaps out, latching onto the evil queen's wrist with its teeth*
EQ: *lets out a yelp, letting of Ed's ankle and sliiiiding through the mud and down the cliffside, screaming as she falls*
IC!Ed: *stops sliding when the weight from his leg is lifted, blinks in confusion as he scrambles to get himself onto all fours and peer over the edge of the cliff* ...shit...
Badger: *kind of shuffles off triumphantly, having let go before he could be pulled over*
OOC!Scar: *seriously worried about Ed now - he wouldn't have taken an apple, right?*
IC!Ed: *stares for a little while longer before finally getting to his feet and heading back to the little cottage place*
SW: *still sitting there vapidly; moves to latch onto Mal again*
OOC!Scar: *EEP, ears go red, tries to wriggle free* Seriously. I can't marry you.
SW: Why not..?
IC!Ed: *victorious arrival, all dirty and disheveled. pauses in the doorway, to stare at Mal being latched onto by Snow White, blinking in surprise*
OOC!Scar: Well ... uh ... I'm kind of ... In love with someone else
OOC!Scar: *turns to stare at Ed in UTTER HORROR, oh the timing*
SW: ............... *stares at him aghast* WHAT?!
IC!Ed: *stares* .......
IC!Ed: *slooooooow smiiiiiirk. oh, the poor bastard*
OOC!Scar: *winces, his eardrums which are already abused from a lifelong love of loud music throbbing*
SW: WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU'RE IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE ELSE?! YOU CAN'T BE! I'M YOUR TRUE LOVE!
OOC!Scar: Hi, Ed. *intensely uncomfortable with this situation, especially since he can just SEE that look on Ed's face, and wants to smack him for it*
OOC!Scar: *winces, OW OW OW TOO LOUD*
IC!Ed: *ohhhh how he wants to laugh. he wants to laugh soooo much*
OOC!Scar: Ed - help me - quick! *almost drowned out by the shrieking*
SW: *death glares at Ed* HE CAN'T HELP YOU! TELL ME WHAT YOU MEAN?!
Posse of Wildlife: *slowly decending in a menacing fashion up Mal and Ed*
OOC!Scar: I - don't - *struggling to get free* What? What part of that don't you get? Look, I'm glad you're OK, and I'm - flattered, I guess, that you think you're in love with me but - shiiiit *glancing at the encroaching posse* But -
IC!Ed: *blinks, WOW that shrill sound hurts... and holy shit, the cutesy animals are vicious now* Mal... guitar?
Posse of Wildlife: *circling now and that deer kind of looks like it has rabies*
OOC!Scar: *already thinking that, trying to twist his arms at least so he can reach the neck, nodding Ed over, before realizing that Snow White, too, would be transported if he tried to get away now; thinking at light speed*
IC!Ed: *moving closer to Mal* Sheesh, I save everyone's lives and this is the thanks I get... Go figure.
OOC!Scar: Ok! OK! I was lying! I'm not in love with someone else, I'll marry you.
OOC!Scar: *shoots Ed a work-with-me kind of glance*
SW: *instantly beams* Oh, wonderful~ We'll get married right now!
Posse of Wildlife: *setting: adorable*
IC!Ed: *raises an eyebrow at Mal, then gives a tiny nod of his head. wow that worked well*
OOC!Scar: *stammering a little, heart racing* Y-yes, well, you see ... where I come from, the man has to propose first, right? And... and to do that I have to play you a song. Would you let go so I can play you a love song - er - my dear?
OOC!Scar: *grinds his teeth, knowing Ed will never let him hear the end of this*
IC!Ed: *this is Ed's steely face. not gonna snicker. yet*
IC!Ed: It's true. You need to let him play.
SW: *blushes brightly, absolutely flattered, and lets him go* Of course!
OOC!Scar: *gets shakily away, pulling up a chair and indicating she should sit*
SW: *practically prances over to the chair, sitting primly*
OOC!Scar: *clears his throat, beckoning Ed closer and pulling his guitar in front of him, tuning it - how had it managed to get so out of whack?*
IC!Ed: *still near Mal, discreetly grabbing onto his right shoulder*
OOC!Scar: *hisses* Lower, man, go for the elbow. *out loud* And now... *gets the pick from his pocket, setting his fingers aright*
SW: *kind of glares at Ed; how dare he touch her fiance, hmph*
IC!Ed: *adjusts accordingly, ignoring the glare*
OOC!Scar: ...SEE YA. *draws the pick across the strings almost viciously, and is gratified by the massive looming of the Gate and the force that is propelling them towards Central once more, though it does make his arm hurt quite a bit...*
SW: WHAT..?! *stands up as they disappear, staring at the spot they were once at before breaking down into sobs because her prince DITCHED her; feel the pain through the universe, ho*
IC!Ed: *clenches his jaw when he sees the Gate and closes his eyes... and next thing he knows, they've successfully jumped dimensions*
OOC!Scar: *sets down his guitar and backpack with relief and instantly flops backwards over his clothes-strewn bed with a huge sigh*
IC!Ed: *falls back on his butt on the floor near the bed, leaning against the edge of it*
OOC!Scar: *drawn-out* Fuuuuu-uuuck.
OOC!Scar: *tilting his head up a bit* Shit, you're soaked. What happened?
IC!Ed: *shrugs* Fought that crazy queen on top of a mountain in the rain. ...She fell.
OOC!Scar: *too shocked at it all to be surprised, just makes a small noise of acknowledgment* I just - I resuscitated her, right...
OOC!Scar: ... And then she starts going on about how I'm her prince or some shit. Crazy bitch. *ears still ringing from the shrieking*
IC!Ed: *snickers*
IC!Ed: "Prince Mal"...? *snorts*
OOC!Scar: *rolls his eyes* I know, I know... *clears his throat, his thoughts filled with the memory of the smirk Ed was wearing when he walked in - when he heard - * Anyway. We know it works, now.
IC!Ed: *still snickering, extremely amused* Yeah, we do.
OOC!Scar: *lets the silence reign, just catching his breath still, kicking off his shoes*
IC!Ed: *smirks again* ...So what're you gonna do when the girl you're really in love with finds out about how you got nice and cozy with another girl?
OOC!Scar: *jumps out of his skin, sliding off the bed and to the floor with an undignified noise and plenty of flailing* Shut it.
OOC!Scar: She's - it's not - *incoherent*
IC!Ed: *bursts out laughing*
OOC!Scar: *grumbles under his breath* We weren't cozy. She was psychotic, I swear. *running a hand through his hair*
OOC!Scar: You didn't hear a thing, you hear? I don't want you to talk about or ... trying to get me to say who it is ... or anything! *vehement*
IC!Ed: *teasing grin* I dunno, Mal. It did sort of seem like you were enjoying it for a minute there. You should've seen the look on your face... *snickers some more*
OOC!Scar: *ears burning* Shut up, man.
OOC!Scar: *after a moment, slaps Ed on the shoulder and sighs once more* Damn it ... I tell you, Ed, after that .... I never want to see a squirrel or a rabbit ever again.
IC!Ed: *takes a moment to calm down, then leans back with a tired sigh* I second that.
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Date: 2008-02-23 08:30 am (UTC)Oh my god you complete and utter crackheads. ...You just raped my childhood, and boy did I enjoy it~.
*snicker* Seriously, that was fucking amazing. Although I am incredibly disturbed by how much Snow reminds me of Clara. *eye twitch*
no subject
Date: 2008-02-23 08:47 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-02-23 09:49 am (UTC)...I swear I will respond to all threads tomorrow. I am too tired to rp at the moment.